Virgil – The Man's Guide

F*ck You Smell Good

It might be a work colleague, a friend, the guy who serves your morning coffee, or even that random lad you always seem to pass during your daily commute. Some people just constantly smell great. For years, I was confused and too awkward to ask: what’s the secret? How can you smell so delightful, even after a full day of work?

Then I did.

I thought being clean and spraying the same Christmas Lynx Africa over my clothes before leaving the house was enough. Maybe for you that is, but once you start following a few simple steps, you’ll be that guy people walk past and think: Fuck, he smells good.

Skin Care  – Roll-on – Aftershave

The body’s largest organ, making up around 15% of your total body mass, is skin. Don’t take it for granted. If you want to smell good, this is the very first step. You can buy the most expensive soap, deodorant or aftershave, but if your skin is not hydrated and moisturised, it’s basically pointless.

Washing your body every day is a given, but I understand people have different routines and time constraints. However, no matter when you wash your body, let’s do it right. A good-smelling soap is a pleasure, but being consistent with one that works with your skin is key to avoiding irritation or dryness.

The scent from your soap is just the thin layer that starts you off but using a simple non-scented soap is just as good.

Wash your body every day and exfoliate twice a week. This means removing the dead skin from your body. See those weird, scrunchy-looking things hanging in some people’s showers? Those are loofahs — one of those, a shower brush, or whatever exfoliating pad TikTok is pushing will do the job. Gently scrub your body with one of these twice a week. On the other days, I mainly just wash the red zones (face, pits, crotch, arse). This is enough to remove daily grime and get rid of sweaty, stanky skin.

Once you’ve finished your daily wash, we hit the most crucial stage: hydrating your body. Pat yourself dry and get to work. Find yourself a good all-round moisturiser. I personally use CeraVe Moisturising Lotion. Fill your palms and cover every inch of your body — chest, arms, pits, legs and downstairs. It’s weird at first, but you get used to it. Once you’re completely lathered, I tend to do my facial skincare routine. You’ll find that post somewhere.

You’d imagine deodorant would be the next step — spraying as much as possible under your freshly moisturised pits — but in fact, that will dry out all your hard work. Find a good roll-on. I’ve been using L’Oréal Men Expert from the start and can’t fault it. Roll-on is a more effective and gentler way to stop sweating, plus no more white stains on T-shirts. A good roll-on will keep your pits hydrated and deodorised all day.

Now you’ve scrubbed up, lathered up, made your way back to the bedroom and got dressed. This is the fun bit: aftershave.

We won’t get into which aftershaves just yet, but psychology tells us that if you match your aftershave to the time of year it was made for, it will smell better. I also thought this was nonsense — until I didn’t.

A good example is my go-to summer scent. One of my favourite dupes — yes, dupe fragrances that cost around £50, DXB by Maison Aarar. It’s vibrant, fresh and light, with sweet orange, grapefruit and citrus. To me, it smells like a better Louis Vuitton Afternoon Swim at an eighth of the price. I could wear it every day — and I have — but I’ve only ever received compliments or been asked what I’m wearing on a sunny or warm day. Which, in Scotland, is basically never, but the psychology is spot on. Give yourself and others the scent that matches the day.

Applying aftershave is personal preference and a fine balance. Too little and it’s pointless; too much and it’s offensive. This step also depends on genetics. Some people’s skin needs more, some less. Trial and error is inevitable, but find a trusted friend or colleague to give you feedback.

My standard spray routine consists of six sprays. This is generally more than Google will tell you, but this is me. I spray the side of each ear/neck area, both inner elbows and both wrists. These are pulse points — the theory is that they’re warmer and help the scent last longer throughout the day. I don’t spray my clothes, as fragrances can react and smell different on fabric than on skin. If your clothes smell bad, that’s a problem for a future blog.

Final tip for lunchtime gym-goers: get yourself a pack of decanters on Amazon for a few quid and keep them in your gym bag. This allows you to top up anything you’ve washed away at the gym.